Urges are not convictions. Though we may follow our urges rather than our beliefs at times, urges do not reveal the real person. They are one aspect of us, but not the defining aspect. Our chosen values define us more than any genetic predispositions or conditioned urges.
Convictions, however, are not beliefs. We are convinced of many things we don't really believe. Some people feel certain they're not afraid to die, yet they continue steering their cars away from danger and gathering the money they need to survive. In reality, these people are so terrified of death that they cannot even admit their fear to themselves.
Our convictions are what we tell ourselves. We are truly convinced of our convictions ... on a conscious level. Convictions speak to who we want to be and who we think we are.
Our real beliefs, on the other hand, can only be determined by observing our actions.
So urges speak to our genetic inheritance and our conditioning. The conditioning comes from many sources: culture, physical environment, and habits growing out of past choices are a few.
Convictions speak to our self image.
Beliefs - the values underlying our actual actions - speak to who we are from a dry, dispassionate, third person perspective.
But who are we really?
I don't have a God's-eye perspective on humanity. But I feel my "essence" is a combination of pure awareness and free will choices (within the bounds of the possible).
If true, then "being true to myself" means staying in touch with reality and adopting attitudes and choices and behaviors in harmony with my highest, noblest conceptions of my potential (again, within the bounds of reality).
But this presupposes I know what exactly I mean by noble, worthy choices and actions.
As I've discussed before, the desirability of joy and the undesirability of suffering are absolute facts that can be experienced directly. They are neither theoretical constructs nor matters of opinion or taste. I explained in a previous post that a life spent pursuing happiness and preventing suffering for oneself and others is demonstrably a worthy life.
Thus "noble" and "worthy" are equivalent to "healthy" in its broadest sense: psychological health, financial health, the health of society, and the health of the planet. Choosing and acting in healthy ways is living a noble life.
Finally, If I am right that the most important feature of being human is having a greater range of awareness and a freer will than other life, then you cannot be a human "being" without stagnating.
Free will choices and fully conscious awareness change and evolve and respond second by second. So a human being is a stillborn person. To actualize our highest, noblest potential, we must embrace our true natures: We are human becomings. Let's become healthy.
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